Grief and Loss
Here at the Counseling & Wellness Center, we understand that grief and loss can affect people in an infinite number of ways. There are no specific outlines of "how you should feel" or "what you should do". Your emotions are individual and unique, and only you will feel the way you do. One of the most important parts of understanding grief and loss is that we will all experience it during our lifetimes - you are not alone!
Should you wish to set up an appointment with us, please call us at (860) 832-1926, even if you'd just like to talk.
A Safe Place To Grieve
Our friends at the Safe Place to Grieve Foundation also offer free services in aiding you through difficult times. The 501(c)(3) organization provides community outreach through a non-clinical, educational manner and offers support services at different times and days throughout the week.
You may contact the foundation directly at (860) 563-5677 or by email for general information on their programs and services. The foundation is located at 109 Main Street in Wethersfield, CT 06109.
Contact the Bereavement Program Director - Karen Carney (RN, LCSW, FT) - prior to accessing any services or programs. You may want to do so in collaboration with your personal counselor at CCSU.
What is Grief?
Grief is the normal response of sorrow, emotion, and confusion that comes from losing someone or something important to you. It is a natural part of life. Grief is a typical reaction to death, divorce, job loss, a move away from family and friends, or loss of good health due to illness.
Depression is more than a feeling of grief after losing someone or something you love. Clinical depression is a whole body disorder. It can take over the way you think and feel. Symptoms of depression include:
- A sad, anxious, or "empty" mood that won't go away
- Loss of interest in what you used to enjoy
- Low energy, fatigue, feeling "slowed down"
- Changes in sleep patterns
- Loss of appetite, weight loss, or weight gain
- Trouble concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
- Feeling hopeless or gloomy
- Feeling guilty, worthless, or helpless
- Thoughts of death or suicide or a suicide attempt
- Recurring aches and pains that don't respond to treatment
If you recently experienced a death or other loss, these feelings may be part of a normal grief reaction. But if these feelings persist with no lifting mood, ask for help. We are here for you!
Marcus White, Room 205
Just after a death or loss, you may feel empty and numb, as if you are in shock. You may notice physical changes such as trembling, nausea, trouble breathing, muscle weakness, dry mouth, or trouble sleeping and eating.
You may become angry - at a situation, a particular person, or just angry in general. Almost everyone in grief also experiences guilt. Guilt is often expressed as "I could have, I should have, and I wish I would have" statements.
People in grief may have strange dreams or nightmares, be absent-minded, withdraw socially, or lack the desire to return to work. While these feelings and behaviors are normal during grief, they will pass.
Grief lasts as long as it takes you to accept and learn to live with your loss. For some people, grief lasts a few months. For others, grieving may take years.
The length of time spent grieving is different for each person. There are many reasons for the differences, including personality, health, coping style, culture, family background, and life experiences. The time spent grieving also depends on your relationship with the person lost and how prepared you were for the loss.
Every person who experiences a death or other loss must complete a four-step grieving process:
♥ Accept the loss
♥ Work through and feel the physical and emotional pain of grief
♥ Adjust to living in a world without the person or item lost
♥ Move on with life
The grieving process is over only when a person completes the four steps.
We're only a phone call away: (860) 832-1926, or please stop by in person and visit us in Marcus White, Room 205. There is no issue "too small" to bring to a judgement-free environment in which you are free to express any personal concerns about your physical or mental well-being.